Under My Skin
by stardust2002
Summary: Songfic with 'I've Got You Under My Skin'. Just how much does Lee really love Kara?


Under My Skin

This is a songfic inspired by Latteaddict's picture essay entitled 'How does Lee love Kara - let us count the ways' part one. I've since seen part two and I think it deserves a sequel.(give me a few days ...) It made me head back into the Lee/Kara territory that I've been slowly moving away from since the finale. Thank you Latteaddict for that! The song is titled 'I've Got You Under My Skin' and I deserve to be smacked upside the head for not thinking of using it sooner. Kara is definitely under Lee's skin and there is no way he is ever going to get rid of her. Spoilers from the mini straight through to LDYB part 2. So enjoy ...

**ooooooooooooooo**

_I've got you under my skin_

_I've got you deep in the heart of me_

**ooooooooooooooo**

Lee's heart thumped painfully in his chest at the first sight of her, sweat coating her straining muscles as she did push up after push up. Her hair was shorter and she was thinner but she was still just as beautiful as he remembered her.

He knew it was wrong for him to feel the way he did, but he just couldn't help himself.

**ooooooooooooooo**

_So deep in my heart that you're really a part of me_

_I've got you under my skin_

**ooooooooooooooo**

The handshake seemed to go on forever ... and Lee didn't want it to end. Ever. When he'd been on Colonial One, positive he was going to die, his last thoughts had been of her - not the President, not the other thousands of people about to die, but her - the woman who'd stolen his heart without even knowing it. The way she looked at him now, touched him, it was like she didn't believe he was really there.

He knew it was wrong for him to love the feel of her skin touching his, but he just couldn't help himself.

**oooooooooooooooo**

_I've tried so not to give in_

_I've said to myself this affair never will go so well_

_But why should I try to resist when baby I know so well_

_I've got you under my skin_

**oooooooooooooooo**

He knew he could get into big trouble for what he'd just done to the XO but he didn't care. There was no way, _no way _he was going to leave her behind. He could fool others by saying she was one of their most important military assets and that she was a part of the Adama family, but he couldn't fool himself. He loved her, and the thought of leaving her to die was one he just couldn't stomach.

He knew it was wrong to be willing to sacrifice all of humanity to save her, but he just couldn't help himself.

**ooooooooooooooo**

_I'd sacrifice anything, come what may_

_For the sake of having you near_

**ooooooooooooooo**

They'd sacrificed every viper they had, and over half their fuel supply in order to rescue her, and it still hadn't been enough. She'd had to save herself. Lee's heart went cold every time he thought about how close he'd come to killing her in that stupid, frakking cylon raider. The stupid, frakking, amazing machine that had saved her life. For that, Lee would be forever grateful. He could barely keep his hands off her when she returned - he was so glad she was alive, there. He'd visited her daily and tried to encourage her though she'd constantly groused and complained and wouldn't even try to walk. Damn Starbuck pride. The smile that had crossed his face when she'd shown up in the hangar bay out of the blue had been one of pure joy. Finally, she was back.

He knew his happiness shouldn't hinge on her, but he just couldn't help himself.

**oooooooooooooooo**

_In spite of a warning voice that comes in the night_

_And repeats, repeats in my ear_

**oooooooooooooooo**

She'd looked positively radiant that night and Lee had just about collapsed when she'd turned around and given him that 'come frak me' smile. He knew he'd looked foolish - a tongue-tied, hormone crazed teenager, but he couldn't help himself. He'd been absolutely captivated by her. He'd already fallen in love with her 'wild tomboy' side, and now, for the first time ever, he was seeing the other side of her - the sexy, self-assured woman. And he was speechless.

He knew he shouldn't be so obvious in his desire for her but he just couldn't help himself.

**oooooooooooooooo**

_Don't you know little fool, you never can win_

_Use your mentality, wake up to reality_

**oooooooooooooooo**

Wake up and smell the coffee Lee - she went 'home' with someone else. And Lee could literally feel his heart breaking into pieces. Not just that she'd slept with someone else - that could be forgiven, but that she'd disappeared. Just up and frakking left without a word. And now Lee was dying - praying every day that she'd come back so he'd have a a second chance with her. A chance to tell her and show her how he really felt. The jealous barbs he'd thrown her way really weren't him, it had just been his wounded pride talking. He needed her back now - more than he needed anything.

He knew he shouldn't be praying to gods he didn't even believe in, but he just couldn't help himself.

**ooooooooooooooooo**

_But each time I do just the thought of you_

_Makes me stop before I begin_

_'cause I've got you under my skin_

**ooooooooooooooooo**

She'd come back and Lee was overjoyed. His heart had pounded painfully the minute he'd heard her voice over the comm, more so when he realized how close they'd come to destroying her. He'd kissed her, told her he loved her, but he hadn't gotten quite the reaction he'd hoped for. She'd teased him - typical Starbuck style - but at least he'd finally had the courage to do it. Now he had to wait and see what she did with the knowledge.

He knew she probably didn't feel the same way he did and that her response would only disappoint him, but he just couldn't help himself.

**ooooooooooooooooo**

_I'd sacrifice anything, come what may_

_For the sake of having you near_

_In spite of a warning voice that comes in the night_

_And repeats, how it yells in my ear_

**ooooooooooooooooo**

"You were right - she doesn't want you. She doesn't love you. She loves him." The words stung painfully in Lee's mind, but no more so than her actions did. She'd led him on, let him believe she wanted him, but all she'd wanted was a quick frak to alleviate her pain. Lee's heart felt like it was shattering yet again. It was too late, she'd found someone else.

It seemed that loving her was a one-way ticket to pain, but he just couldn't help himself.

**ooooooooooooooooo**

_Don't you know little fool, you never can win_

_Use your mentality, wake up to reality_

_But each time I do just the thought of you_

_Makes me stop before I begin_

**oooooooooooooooo**

He'd tried - the gods knew he'd tried to forget her. Move on, find someone else - that's what he'd done, but he couldn't purge her from his heart and mind, no matter how hard he tried. And Dee had finally given up on him, realizing she'd never get what she wanted, which was fine with Lee. It had taken nearly a year, but he'd finally come to terms with the fact that _she _was a part of him, under his skin, in his heart, whether he liked it or not.

It seemed he might be destined to wait forever for a woman who would never love him in return, but he couldn't help himself.

**ooooooooooooooooo**

_'Cause I've got you under my skin_

_And I like you under my skin_

**ooooooooooooooooo**

He couldn't help but feel a pang of pleasure as well as guilt that Anders died. She was distraught - as well she would be, she loved him. Lee hadn't wanted to admit it, even to himself, but it was true - she'd loved him. But now things were different, and not just in the obvious way. She was allowing him to hold her, comfort her in her sorrow. She was finally opening up and sharing something of herself with him. Allowing him to peek into her heart, even if for a brief moment. Maybe there was still a chance that he could earn a place there too.

After all they'd been through, there was only a slim chance that it could happen between them, but no matter how slim it was, Lee was willing to wait as long as it took. He loved her - he couldn't help himself.

_Fin_


End file.
